Some people just have a way with words, and other people … oh … not have way.
The four most beautiful words in our common language: I told you so.
I think I’m the happiest I’ve ever been. Part of it is just learning what makes me happier and doing more of it, and learning what makes me unhappier and doing less of it.
writer and illustrator
Hate to break it to you, Facebook, but the entire Internet is already a Dislike button.
Nobody made a greater mistake than he who did nothing because he could do only a little.
statesman and orator
“A comfort zone is a beautiful place, but nothing ever grows there.”
Never trust someone who takes hours to text you back, but when you hang out with them they check their phone every minute.
Nature abhors a vacuum, but not as much as a cat does.
We need a 12-step group for compulsive talkers. They could call it On Anon Anon.
At what age do you think it’s appropriate to tell a highway it’s adopted?
Trust is like a mirror, you can fix it if it’s broken, but you can still see the crack in that Mother Fuc@@’s reflection.
A Canadian psychologist is selling a video that teaches you how to test your dog’s IQ. Here’s how it works: If you spend $12.99 for the video, your dog is smarter than you.
“99% of all problems can be solved by money — and for the other 1% there’s alcohol.”
Quentin R. Bufogle
What’s best way to build upper arm strength? Take lots of selfies.
“Generally speaking, I try not to generalize.”
Addison C. Arthur
What are the cost recovery charges for 911 calls where you live? Is it considered a standard fee such as municipal taxes for street maintenance, etc.?
Devin Kelly: Berkowitz administration proposes to charge more on Anchorage telephone bills to pay for 911 system
Understanding Your Telephone Bill
911, LNP, and TRS charges
911 – To help local governments pay for emergency services such as fire and rescue.
By Daniel Vaughn: Snow’s Queen
On Saturdays Tootsie Tomanetz cooks barbecue the old-fashioned way for legions of loyal fans. That doesn’t mean she’ll ever give up her day job.
Auto body shops must love this car wash in the winter ca-ching ca-ching
Jason Torchinsky: This May Be The Saddest, Stupidest Exit From A Carwash Wreck Ever