Some people just have a way with words, and other people … oh … not have way.
The four most beautiful words in our common language: I told you so.
I think I’m the happiest I’ve ever been. Part of it is just learning what makes me happier and doing more of it, and learning what makes me unhappier and doing less of it.
writer and illustrator
Hate to break it to you, Facebook, but the entire Internet is already a Dislike button.
Nobody made a greater mistake than he who did nothing because he could do only a little.
statesman and orator
“A comfort zone is a beautiful place, but nothing ever grows there.”
Never trust someone who takes hours to text you back, but when you hang out with them they check their phone every minute.
Nature abhors a vacuum, but not as much as a cat does.
We need a 12-step group for compulsive talkers. They could call it On Anon Anon.
At what age do you think it’s appropriate to tell a highway it’s adopted?
Trust is like a mirror, you can fix it if it’s broken, but you can still see the crack in that Mother Fuc@@’s reflection.
A Canadian psychologist is selling a video that teaches you how to test your dog’s IQ. Here’s how it works: If you spend $12.99 for the video, your dog is smarter than you.
“99% of all problems can be solved by money — and for the other 1% there’s alcohol.”
Quentin R. Bufogle
What’s best way to build upper arm strength? Take lots of selfies.
“Generally speaking, I try not to generalize.”
Addison C. Arthur